wizardry

(Source: youtube.com)

Those friends you always invite out and their answer is always no like…

and i’m always just like…

cause i’m always like…

so i just assume everyone else is too…but i understand LEAVING YOUR HOME isn’t everyone’s forte. 

A list of A+ insults

poryqon:

if u R ever in an argument use these insults and u will make the other person cry bc there R so good

  • half eaten sandwich
  • useless fungal infection
  • literal turd burger
  • Netflix® buffer
  • 2003 fergie
  • 5th president James Monroe
  • half chewed pencil
  • The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania
  • absolute white crayon
  • quiet meme thief
  • TI-84 plus Silver Edition™ Calculator by Texas Instruments®
  • diarrhea apocalypse

when people actually go along with my snapchat “conversations”….

I just changed my whole outfit (bra included) while driving 65/70ish mph. I think thats my best record. :o


love-portlandia:

Portlandia season 4 episode 2